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7 Tricks To Improve Your Relationship In 10 Minutes

Relationships are hard work. While it might be great to spend a week together in retirement, it is not the only way you can regain intimacy.

There are many occasions every day to show your partner you care. Get to know them better, and forget what divides you.

These 7 strategies will help you strengthen your relationship in just 10 minutes.

Have a “mindful conversation”

Mindful conversation does not have the ability to improve romantic relationships. However, it can be a valuable exercise in learning how to listen and to pay attention to your partner, instead of waiting for your turn. to intervene.

It works like this: One partner can be “A”, and the other one can be “B”

  • A speaks, and B listens for a specific time (say, three mins).
  • B replies with “What I heard is …”
  • A provides feedback to B, and B replies until A is satisfied.
  • A and B switch roles.

It is uncomfortable at first but it becomes easier with time.

Hug or kiss your partner

Gretchen Rubin, happiness expert, says she and her family practice “warm greetings” and “goodbyes.” Everyone says a warm hello and goodbye when someone comes or goes.

Research suggests that romantic satisfaction is tied to physical affection. Take a moment to show your partner you care.

Thank you for something small.

Janice Kaplan, journalist and author of “The Gratitude Diaries”, recounts her year-long journey to be more grateful for everyone in her life, including her husband.

She wrote that her husband fixed a leaky faucet and she was grateful. This has helped to improve their relationship.

Psychologists know for a long time that couples who show gratitude to one another are more likely stay together. Even expressing gratitude to your partner once can have a huge positive effect.

It is likely that a simple act of gratitude triggers an entire cycle of gratitude, generosity, and appreciation: You thank your partner because they make you feel valued and invest more in the relationship. This makes you more grateful to her.

Reorganize your housework

Laura Vanderkam, a time management expert, and Sarah Hart-Unger, a physician recommend a simple strategy for relieving stress in your relationship.

It consists of two steps.

Each family member writes down the current family responsibilities they are responsible for.

Every person has a different set of responsibilities.

It is important to determine what percentage of your load you are carrying and to see if you can trade some tasks so everyone can do the things they love.

Do the “just as me” exercise

Here’s a tip by Chade-Meng Tan (a former Google engineer who created the emotional intelligence course “Search Within You”)

Tan’s 2012 book “Search Within Yourself”, also known as “Search Within Yourself”, explains how Tan handles conflict with his wife.

“I picture the other person in my next room. This person is just like me. They want to live in freedom from suffering, be happy, and so forth. Then I wish the person happiness, joy, and freedom from suffering. Within a few moments, I feel much better about the situation, myself and the other person. My anger quickly dissipates.

“Practice the “10-minute rule”

Terri Orbuch, a sociology professor and relationship expert, suggests the 10-minute rule.

Orbuch explains the rule in her book, “5 Simple Steps for Taking Your Marriage From Good to Great”. It is a daily briefing, where you and your spouse talk about everything, except children and jobs.

For example, you can ask questions like:

  • Are you closer to your father or mother than you thought? What is the reason?
  • What age do you feel inside? What is the reason?
  • What are your thoughts on the worst three songs ever?
  • What is the one thing that you want to be remembered?

Orbuch says that learning about your spouse makes it feel new and fresh again. It also “mimics your emotional and physical state in the early years of your marriage.”

Discover something about your partner

Nicholas Epley, psychologist and author of Mindwise (2014), cites research that shows that we think we know our partners better than we do.

Epley suggests a simple solution. Don’t assume that you know everything. Ask questions and listen for the answers.


Hello, I’m Rachel Collins. Until recently, I ran my own patchwork quilt business. Having retired from that I have turned my e-commerce site into this blog where I discuss business, home and garden and lifestyle topics for you to enjoy...

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